Day 1: the flight

One botched check-in, two airplanes, one missed flight, 9 missing suitcases and a whole lot of jet lagged underslept children later and we're sade and sound in Rennertshofen.
We arrived at JFK with a minimal amount of time to check in due to heavy traffic in Manhattan--as always. Natalie and the kids went to the 1st class check in while I waited in line for twenty minutes behind two very awkward German lesbians who had to kiss each other every chance they could. I finally made it to the counter, my baggage made it through, my tickets in hand, and I see Natalie still waiting at the counter. They couldn't find her tickets. Luckily she still had the receipt or we would probably still be waiting at JFK trying to check in. We rushed through security and just barely made it to the gate when they began boarding.
I was seated next to a very good looking German young man and a balding German on the other side. All the stewardesses spoke German to us, which didn't make sense to me seeing as we were flying out of NYC. I hate having to say "I'm sorry I am American and cannot understand what you're saying." It makes me feel ignorant. I sat in that chair for 8 hours without any chance to get up and walk around until right before breakfast. I got up to change Mariella's nappy and I think I heard every joint in my body creak. There was one foot of space between your seat and the one in front of you, and you were sitting knee to knee with the person next to you. Usually I don't mind riding coach, but this airline was meant for midgets.
We landed in Düsseldorf as our connecting flight was leaving the gate. The swine flu is a major scare right now in Germany, so we had to fill out a form before we landed with all of our information and any symptoms we were feeling. The only box I stupidly checked was a runny nose and it took ten minutes to convince the doctor waiting at the gate that it was just allergies. This is the time when you are allowed to lie to your doctor. We walked through the airport to our next gate and I remembered we didn't have Mariella's stroller. I ran all the way back to the gate, through the swarm of doctors only to find out that in Düsseldorf they take the strollers down with the other luggage and we can pick it up in Munich. Completely useless for people with connecting flights. Natalie and the kids didn't have their connecting tickets because of the screwy checkin at JFK, so we stood in line with four red-eyed, sleepy children running on 1 hour or less of sleep. Tension was high, and patience was running thin. We finally got their tickets and found our gate with enough time to change Mariella and sugar charge the kids with M&M's and Starbursts.
Our next flight was even more cramped, but the flight to Munich was only an hour or so. When we arrived there we were all feeling better that we got there safely with minimal setbacks. Our luggage didn't show. Luckily a very nice airline worker opened the stash of forgotten luggage and gave us carseats for the kids on the drive to the estate. It rained on the way there, but only for a few minutes.
After admiring the German landscape and farmlands, we made it to Natalie's parents estate. I think I've gotten lost at least 5 times already in half a day. It's absolutely amazing, and Natalie's parents have been so accomodating and sweet.
We ate lunch and I took a shower and slept for a few hours to make it through the day. I woke up and the bags were here! However, my duffel bag and half of two booster seats were missing. Natalie was furious. I'm just tired of all the screw-ups. After some rude phone calls, they said they wouldn't deliver the bag because it was on the carousel when we got there, which was a total lie. It must have been on the flight before us. The one we missed. Ten minutes later they called and said they would deliver it two days later, which didn't help me in the least, as my prescription medication was in the bag. Yay withdrawls. After dinner they said they would deliver it the next day.
Moral of the story: Never ever, NEVER fly AirBerlin.